Rob Oxford: Moms Rock It! (not to be confused with the band)

Sunday, May 13, 2018

Rob and his mother
By Rob Oxford

I was sitting at a red light downtown recently and gracefully making her way across the street in front of me was an expectant mother. If I were to guess and it would be nothing more than that, she was well into her pregnancy.

She appeared to be a professional, confidently carrying herself and her child. Stylish in her business clothes and elegant, she had that "glow" that comes with a pending birth.

I'm not certain as to why, but I immediately flashed back to when my wife was pregnant. Minutes later I was in a commercial load zone calling the Mother of my 2 boys.

I owed her an apology.

I don't know why the sight of this particular Mom-To-Be initiated a sudden desire to reflect, but it did. I realized right then and there that even though I read the books, attended the vast majority of doctor appointments, assembled the crib, shopped for baby clothes, made special trips to the store for Sour Patch Kids and was by her side the day both my sons were born, she had done it all ... and she did it on her own. I was merely a spectator with a front row seat.

There have been countless stand up routines about fatherhood, mine is not a unique tale and although some of what I have to say may be humorous, it is meant to be a sincere acknowledgement that my wife - and all Moms for that matter - are amazing.

They are the ones whose bodies are changing. They are the ones with the strange cravings. They are the ones whose feet swell. They feel the back pain. They are the ones who have trouble sleeping. They are the ones solely responsible for carrying a child to term and as in the case of my wife, they are the ones put on "bed rest" who must deal with the inability to naturally give birth to a 9lb. 15oz. child with a big head.

The Oxford family bringing baby Robbie
home from the hospital
Let us also not forget about the roller coaster of emotions she is experiencing. It's not just the physical challenges, but the psychological fact that she really is turning into her mother.

Which is not in any way to suggest this is a bad thing, it's simply a fact. She will be forever more responsible for a life other than her own. At least until that equally painful day when she must allow her beautiful baby bird to leave her nest.

When his wife is expecting, a husband tends to think more about the future instead of the present. Asking himself what he feels are the important questions. 

Can we afford another mouth to feed? Am I going to be getting enough sleep? Will he grow up to be a pro athlete? How long will it be before we can have relations again?

Dads, if your wife is expecting, be it your first, second, who knows - maybe it's your sixth child, it's never too late to pay Mom the respect she so deserves. I know you're working long hours and the lawn needs mowing. I know your favorite neighbor has a new big screen and the Mariners are off to a great start, but this is your time to shine. Don't forget to call her throughout the day, offer to bring home dinner, surprise her with flowers, remember to put the toilet seat down, but most importantly don't take any candid photos unless you okay it with her first.


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